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Best Enemies
A Cosmos Without Doctor/Master Scarcely Bears Thinking About
Ask and Ye Shall Receive... 
15th-Apr-2008 02:34 pm
Best Enemies
You can has Anonymous Porn Meme!

Simply comment anonymously with a fic scenario you'd like to see written (your request does have to relate to the Doctor and the Master in some at least tangential way), and respond anonymously to other's requests with anything from a drabbles to full length stories. If you make a ton of requests? You should definitely try and fill a couple.  As Mama in Chicago would explain, it's about reciprocity.

Give it a try! Play hard, have fun!

Edit: *If you really like a prompt and it's been filled, feel free to respond again! One prompt can spawn multiple ficclets!*

Return of Edit: If you don't necessarily need them to sex right nao, but just want to see them do some specific thing, like talk about their granddaughter Susan just as an example (pulled from an idea below), that's awesome as well! Non-porn on the Anon Porn Meme! So Transgressive!

EDIT OF RASSILON: Write RESPONSE in the subject line of a request-fill post to make navigating to responses/telling what's been answered vs. just ditto'd easier for everyone. I don't want to hate on ditos/expansions/qualifications, they're useful! But threads collapse all annoying-like with this layout. x_x

EDIT OF OMEGA: Recently we've had some kinda dubious anon meme posts. The prompts in question are fine; some prompts are responses to others, and you're allowed to have opinions. But exercise best judgement/play well with others. Don't diss other people's prompts when you make yours. You may be anon, but this ain't who_anon. Not everything's gonna be your cuppa. It would be nice if we could avoid 'your choices are invalid, this character is this way' in the future.
3rd-Aug-2011 09:17 am (UTC)
Ten/Simm!Master, while traveling together the Doctor and Master meet versions of themselves from an alternate universe- namely Lumely!Doctor and Pryce!Master. While neither is pleased by their counterparts romantic relationship (all lies), the Doctor is strangely excited by the idea of a buxom blonde female him running around out there somewhere.
21st-Dec-2011 07:59 pm (UTC) - fatally silly response
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times; it was the age of firm denials and great regrets, it was the age of firm etheric beam locators and great breasts; it was the season of Love, it was the season of Hate; they had the universe at their feet, they had the end of the universe in the back of their minds; they were all going direct to Gallifrey, their home, their childhood, to sign a marriage certificate; they were all going direct the other way—In short, two universes had just collided, and they, the Doctor and the Master, faced what might have been and what should have been, what could have been and what would have been, what—-oh, this is getting tedious.

Doctor was bracing herself against the console. “Well, that was fun! Nothing like a little crash bang wallop to get a girl into gear. Now, what’s the damage…” The Doctor said, positively sparking with verve and energy. She ran a hand through her hair and began flipping switches on the console with abandon. At that moment, she spied a tall, thin man with sticking up hair, a pinstriped suit, and a coat that reminded her rather of a cute old thing she’d once tried and failed to get off Janis Joplin’s shoulders and onto her own. The man stared at her as she tweaked a few more knobs.

“Hello! I’m the Doctor. But who can you be? Time traveler, tall, blonde, in my Tardis, flying my Tardis…Brilliant flying, by the way. River? Professor River Song?”

“I’m the Doctor, Doctor! I’m you!”

“A future regeneration! Oh, that’s brilliant. I’ve always wanted those…” the Doctor gestured at her chest.

“They are wonderful, aren’t they?” The Doctor cupped one of her own breasts appreciatively. “But I don’t think I am a future regeneration of yours. I’m on my last life, and I’ve been loads of men—-loads more men than I've had . I’ve been lick-the-mirror-handsome, I’ve been shy of women, I’ve been---well, I’ve been almost everything you could imagine, but I’ve never been you.”

“A parallel universe, then? Again! An alternate me! Master, you’ve got to see this!”
21st-Dec-2011 08:00 pm (UTC) - Re: fatally silly response (second and last part)
Two men strode, simultaneously, into the console room. One was bearded and graying and sporting a little satin and lace number. He was suffused with a flush that could only be interpreted as post coital. The other was clean-shaven, pale, peevish looking, and wearing a tastefully cut but unimaginative suit from the early twenty first century. He, in contrast to his counterpart, was obviously sex deprived. Both were very obviously the Master.

“Oh, you have one too! Wait until you meet mine. So, you and he tied the knot, yet?”

“What? Errr. No, of course not. He’s, well, he’s—“

“Your prisoner,” the Master said, strolling further into the room.

“She’s me! Isn’t that brilliant, Master? And the camp one over there—-he’s you!” The Doctor dove frantically into the nearest available topic of conversation.

“I am not camp!” The Master exclaimed. “Tell them I’m not camp, Doctor!”

“Of course not.” The Doctor said, clapping him on the back. “That’s not negligee he’s wearing—-those are the ceremonial dress robes of the emperor of Primus Prime. And those are etheric beam locators. ” The Doctor moved so that she was standing directly behind the Master. “Play along,” she mouthed, winking stagily.

“Brilliant!” the Doctor said, bouncing on his toes. “Right, then! We’re in the middle of a spatial paradox. Let’s assess the damage!” The Doctor bounded forward and pulled his blonde, buxom counterpart into an enthusiastic kiss.

Both Masters’ eyes widened.

“But what does he think he’s doing! How dare he! That’s my Doctor he’s kissing!”

“He kisses a blonde, I kiss a blonde, he kisses a blonde, I kiss a blonde. Oh, will the cycle of violence never stop!” The other Master said, rolling his eyes.

The Doctors pulled away from each other, breathless.

“I was…assessing the stability of the paradox. Sometimes direct physical contact with the wobbly bits of a spatially aberrant space sends them back, “poof!” where they came from. Nothing to get upset about.”

The bearded, graying, little satin and lace number sporting, post-coital looking Master raised an expressive eyebrow.

“Oh, admit it. You just wanted to kiss her,” the clean-shaven, pale, peevish looking, wearing-a-tastefully-cut-but-unimaginative-suit-from-the-early-twenty-first-century Master said.

“Kiss her? What? Why would I do something as silly as that?” the Doctor grinned.

“Shall we murder him?” Master asked his bearded counterpart.

In response, the other Master laughed his very best evil laugh. “Alike minds think greatly!”
18th-Feb-2012 06:25 pm (UTC) - Re: fatally silly response (second and last part)
Oh my god, anon, this is incredible!!! The opening was just fantastic, and the descriptions of the two Masters is hilarious, and everything's just so wonderfully spot-on. You are my hero, anon. My hero.

“He kisses a blonde, I kiss a blonde, he kisses a blonde, I kiss a blonde. Oh, will the cycle of violence never stop!” The other Master said, rolling his eyes.

I love this line!
19th-Feb-2012 12:44 am (UTC) - Re: fatally silly response (second and last part)
Teehee... "Assessing the stability of the paradox". XD
19th-Feb-2012 03:23 am (UTC) - alike minds think greatly!
I’ve always wanted those…” the Doctor gestured at her chest.

“They are wonderful, aren’t they?” The Doctor cupped one of her own breasts appreciatively.

....cant......get over.......awesomeness........so....cute......

19th-Feb-2012 03:28 am (UTC) - Re: fatally silly response (second and last part)
Wheee! OMG, excellent.
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